My life My perceptions

Wow I truly can not believe it has taken me a week to get back to this. Then again when I look back at this past week I can. The first stumbling block was not having a laptop or computer at my beck and call. You see while I am here in Ohio I literally have to go down to the lobby to use a computer I can blog at. Then there are all the distractions of many people coming and going. Some see you at the computer and ask what you are doing. Hello, what if I am typing something business related that is highly sensitive? Oh well my bad I am in a public spot. But acn I have my space anyway? So what has happened since I last blogged? Not a heck of a lot. I guess. My farm in Missouri is now officially being sold. We will be closing on or around Feb 25. This has me tearing up as I really wanted that place. I could so see myself breaking ground and growing my own food. Having some real live chickens. Laying naked (ok topless) out by the pond. Having a horse or two out there. I hope this really d...

Monday was amazing. After I finished my blog, as advertized I went and swam in the pool. How awesome that it was snowing these big huge fat flakes right outside the huge windows of the pool house. I spent about 30 to 45 min working out in the water. Did some crunches. Gazed at the falling snow from the warm water of the pool. Afterwards I went up to my room and soaked in a tub full of hot bubbly (shampoo as I had no bubble bath) water. And read until I fell asleep. Just marvelous! I did not get much sleep as I kept worrying about the fact that I had not heard from the girl I was training with. I finally got up at 5 and started getting ready for the day. At 6 I finally got the call from Kellie. Yes I could not remember her name and had actually just picked up the phone to call Kris my supervisor when my phone rang. Now Kellie will be picking me up at 6:45. Good thing I was up and dressed. I put some make up on and went down for my free breakfast. I had already decided knowing what th...

As promised I am starting my new life. I am tonight in an awesome Hampton Inn in Youngstown Ohio. As I did on Jan. 2, 2000 this Jan 2, 2012 I am on the road with a new job. The last time I landed in St. Paul Minnesota. I was working as a traveling x-ray/mammography tech. Now I am a Floating Stereotactic Specialist. There are still many things in my old life that I face everyday. From my messed up colon to my husband calling at odd times. I still have questions that need answering about who I am and where my life is going. But I am looking forward to finding who this complicated person is and what will make her happy not just drive her insane. Believe it or not I had someone the other day say I was just too nice for them to hang out with. Lord all I wanted was someone to laugh and joke with. I guess baking a pineapple upside down cake after they had said it was thier favorite was way too much. Whatever. Hell it is one of my favorite cakes. So I got to eat some too! I do not want peo...

Yesterday was a decent day although my belly is acting up. Cramping and diarrhea seem to be my routine at the moment. And my fissure has reopened. So starting fresh there another 6 weeks of healing. So today I will be blogging and writing so I am able to get up and down if the 'urge' hits. I was up off and on most of last night. I never felt less like blogging. My Journey continued: Dinner on my birthday night was all the comfort food. I had a french slam with hot chocolate. No coffee for me because I wanted to sleep. It was good food but not outstanding. When we got back to the room I called my daughter because we had been having an argument. I will not go into details, just that when I thought the conversation was going well she hung up the phone. What did I say? When I called back her husband answered and lets just say he made me pissed off so I hung up on him. I was so tired and cranky and that is never a great time to try to resolve problems. I knew I needed t...

I have decided it is time for my life to be my own. I am going to take charge and change things. In the past I have made some effort in that direction today I am going to go the whole 9 yards. No ifs ands or buts. No excuses. I am the only one who can change me. The beginning of that is this blog. I will be opening my heart and soul here. I may say things that make people uncomfortable and even angry. I have been told the Internet is no place to put your feelings. I learned from reading both my daughter in law's and my step daughter's blogs that sometimes it is the best place to vent those feelings. This is a new age and time. I do not want to bury myself anymore. Where to start? There are so many things running in my brain. I think I will start with the journey I just finished to get to the physical place I am at now. The emotional one is still a long way away. Although I am beginning to see and realize where I am supposed to be. On November 4 th , my 49 th birthday, I lef...

Yesterday I left California for my first trip out of the continental United States. My stomach was all knotted up and I could hardly sleep the night before. However, I was okay with that, as I believed I would be able to get some sleep on the plane. Getting to SFO was not a problem. Rich drove me. We left at about 1pm so I knew I would be there at least 2 hours before the flight. We had weighed my bags before leaving so I was pretty sure there would be no problem there. On the way to SFO I realize that Rich had placed all my bags, including my carry-on in the back. The only reason this was bad was I wanted to double check a few details before I got to the airport. Oh well, it could wait. Then I really looked at him and could not believe what my eyes told me. Did I not just tell him the other day that I would appreciate him looking at least presentable when we go out? Not in stained or ripped clothing please. Matching clothes would be nice. He was actually wearing a yellow and gr...

Well, It has been almost a year since my last blog. I will attempt at doing this again. There has been so much happening in my life and yet I am still at the same place I was before. So I need to change. Change starts on the inside. I must rethink my normal daily habits and figure out which things I need to change in order to make the most of my life. One of those things is playing a computer game for 3 hours a day. I get plugged into World of Warcraft every morning and allow myself to be sucked in almost until I go to work. I need to use it as a reward rather then a main staple of my life. In that regard I will be blogging (I HOPE) every morning including adding my goals for the day month and year. I have so much I want to accomplish in the next 3-6 months. Having said this here are my current goals for today: Personal 1. Blog and Set Goals 2. Be off the computer by 9am 3. Get out of the house and get some serious exercise in. Business 1. Talk to people and get at least 5 names and nu...